Permanent
by And The Moment's Gone
Summary: Will you think that you're all alone when no one's there to hold your hand? When all you know seems so far away and everything is temporary, rest your head. I'm permanent.


**Title**: Permanent  
**Word** **Count**: 1,792  
**Pairings**: Michelle Benjamin / David Shepherd, Jack Benjamin/Joseph  
**Rating**: Rated PG.  
**Warnings**/**Spoilers**: Takes place immediately after Sabbath Queen. Pilgrimage has **NOT** taken place.  
**Summary**: "A Secret for a Secret" between siblings

**Official Disclaimer**: All Kings characters and plots belong to Michael Green and NBC. I do not hold stock either the man or the company. Michelle Benjamin, David Shepherd, and any other character featured are NOT mine. The Title and Lyrics belong to David Cook

* * *

_Will you think that you're all alone  
When no one's there to hold your hand?  
When all you know seems so far away  
And everything is temporary, rest your head  
I'm permanent_

_-Permanent, David Cook_

_

* * *

  
_

He was lying on her bed when she came back into her suite from taking her shower.

Somehow she wasn't shocked to see him there.

"I stole cake."

Readjusting her sleep shirt, she couldn't help the frown that came across her features. She dropped herself onto her dressing table's stool, reaching for her hairbrush and butterfly clip. "I thought Mother declared the party blemished and all ingredients destroyed." Michelle had been dismissed shortly after Rose made her decree. The party would be re-prepared and the guests reinvited to insure that Silas's day would be remembered joyfully.

"To some people in this place, the word 'prince' actually means something." Jack kicked off his shoes and sat up, crossing his legs underneath him. "I managed two decent sized slices before it was tossed."

It was a tradition that had started years and years ago, before their suites were on separate floors and a nurse stopped tucking them in at night. Jack had always had the charm to relieve one of the servants of a plate of the cake that had sat on display and not been touched, and Michelle's bed was always comfier. It didn't matter whose birthday it was or how long the party, afterward had been their time.

With her wet hair pulled up off of her neck, she dropped the brush onto the dressing table. Turning down the CD player with the remote, she stood, making her way to the bed. She took the fork he offered her, adjusting her silken robe over her shoulders and leaning on the foot of the bed. "How is Lucinda?" She asked with a smirk as she took a forkful of cake and pulled her feet up underneath her.

"Sleeping peacefully probably, and wondering at her good fortune." Jack mirrored his sister's grin and tilted his head to match hers."She did look lovely tonight didn't she?"

"Mother was pleased, I'm sure that's all that mattered." She set her fork down on the plate and motioned for him to pass her one of the pillows at the head of the bed. He gave her two. "She probably has half her staff insuring that your picture is in all the papers."

"And Lucinda's invitation as my companion to the new celebration has already been sent out." There was a genuine smile on his face then, a sort of teasing joy with a roll of his eyes to accompany it. Despite their squabbles and differences, there were times when they were allowed to remember that they were still brother and sisters; still twins.

"She said you were separated from her during the blackout?" Michelle questioned carefully, settling herself on the pillows. Her brother didn't open easily and she knew that if her tone was even the least bit wrong he would leave and the brief camaraderie that they held onto would be broken "Where'd you wind up?"

"You and Shepherd were missing too and first" He reminded her steadily, pointing at her with his fork. "I could ask the same question."

He didn't realize that he had told her all she needed to know. She dropped her fork, leaning fully on the pillows. Michelle studied Jack then, watching as his eyebrows rose in confusion at her stare and his lips pierced. With him as her brother she had learned many things, first and foremost was how to keep a secret secret, how to keep the truth safe. She picked up her fork again, taking another bite of the chocolate confection and holding the fork up near her lips. "How's Joseph?"

He pretended not to hear her at first. He took a big bite and wished that he had had the foresight to grab a bottle of champagne on his way out of the kitchen. Any conversation that started with those words warranted alcohol. His eyes dropped to her comforter, the rich reds and blues with the gold embroidery. He picked at one corner slowly, his head not raising again.

When he refused to meet her eyes she nodded simply, licking the frosting off of the side of the fork and setting it on the plate, before moving the plate to the bench at the foot of her bed. It came more quickly then she expected, but she nodded anyway, standing slowly. The lamp beside her bed turned off with a flick of her wrist and she was grateful for the moonlight streaming through her window. It masked her brother's features from her gaze, but left enough light for her to still see around her room. She turned then, resting her feet on the pillows and her head in her brother's lap. She lay like that for a while, hair clip digging into the back of her head and her legs at an odd angle.

Then Jack turned, stretching his body out across his sister's bed, so her head rested against his thigh and he on the multitude of pillows still at the head of the bed. "A secret for a secret?" He asked the ceiling after another moment, frowning even though she couldn't see him.

It was a code that they had developed long before their tradition began; started when Jack first overheard their parents arguing about legitimacy and heirs. Even from the start Rose was championing her sons rise to the throne, and even before her illness Silas sided with his daughter. The two of them had commiserated with ice cream pilfered from the freezers when cook wasn't looking. That was back when Jack's biggest secret was that he was scared of the future that their mother had planned for him, and Michelle thought her French tutor was cute.

"A secret for a secret?" She nodded on his thigh. There was a long pause and she realized that he wasn't about to offer any of the information that she was wondering without a confession of her own first. He had turned into a master negotiator, her brother. "I slept with David." She said at last, feeling her brother's body tense underneath her. She knew of his dislike of David before their mission to Gath, and he hadn't divulged any of his thoughts on the man afterwards. "I took him to the vineyard while the city was dark and we made love on Mother's favorite couch in the sitting room."

He laughed then, a short choppy sound that reverberated throughout the room. His head shook and despite his ironic mirth he knew that his sister was utterly confused. "You realize that I can never comfortably sit in that room now?" He asked her with a smile.

Michelle laughed then as well. "You'll manage." She said a little less then compassionately, reminded of the vision that her thirteen year old self had come across late one night during a state dinner of Jack and an ambassador's daughter on the banquet table after the party had moved into the ballroom. She didn't speak to her brother or the girl for a week afterwards, which proved a tad inconvenient seeing as though she had been charged with providing entertainment for the girl. That had been before… Her eyes closed for a moment and all joy flooded out of her. "How's Joseph?" She asked again, her eyes staring up at the ceiling when her brother's body tensed again.

He took his time with his response, counting each word carefully and trying to find a way to convey to his sister what he needed to say. "Confused." He said at last, his eyes closing and his body feeling heavy. "Just confused."

She nodded. "It isn't easy to be the pawn." She said knowingly. "But I'm sure he understands that you're only doing what you have to do."

"I shouldn't have gone to him tonight." His hands came up over his face and he wiped his eyes and prayed that he didn't start crying. There were still certain things that he could not allow with his sister. "I should have been stronger."

She turned then, rolling onto her stomach and inching up the bed until she and her brother were laying side by side, their shoulders touching. "Everyone's allowed one night." She said quietly, her mind wandering to the time she shared with David. At first she had resolved herself to just one night with him. The only problem was now she couldn't imagine that that was enough. And that was probably how her brother felt. "You're sure that the free press didn't see you?"

There was a rumble and Michelle hoped that it was laughter. "If they did I'm only sure that I'll hear about it from Father." Jack scoffed, before he pulled his arms behind his head. "But with the black out and your disappearance, I can only imagine that they weren't too focused on me." He laughed again. "Thanks for that."

"I live to make your life easier." This time Michelle laughed too, rolling her eyes even though her brother couldn't see them. "I'll plan a trip to the college tomorrow." She decided, running a hand over her head and pulling her hair out of its clip. "Maybe Joseph and I can have lunch."

"You don't have to do that." Jack started, sitting up and shaking his head adamantly. Michelle could see the outline of his face and the way his jaw was quivering.

Michelle ran her hand over his face. "Were you happy?" She asked slowly, watching as he looked away. "When you were…" Her voice caught in her throat and she swallowed. "Were you happy?"

He didn't move, unable to find his voice.

"Then yes I do." She cupped his cheek.

"Then what should I do for you in return?" He asked at last, finding a little humor in his voice.

Michelle shook her head. "There's nothing to do." She told him simply. "Not yet."

He pulled her down again, onto the bed next to him. They curled up together like they had done when they were little, her back to his front, his arms wrapped around her and her hands holding him close. "Everyone's allowed one night." He reminded her when the quiet seemed almost too much.

Her head nodded. "What happens if I want more?"

Jack nodded along with her. "Well then we'll keep that secret together." He decided.


End file.
